Tag Archives: moon

Remembering reminders after forgetting.

I forgot to relate to my suffering with curiosity.



I don’t even think it was a matter of forgetting, because to forget, one has to remember, or have some sense of mind-awareness of it in the first place.

So I guess I wasn’t forgetting, but merely embroiled in a cloud of an internal swirling mix of thoughts, projections, worrying, misperceptions, feelings, & emotions.

Sounds like fun, no?



(Raise your hand if anyone out there feels things really deeply)

O hiiiiiiii!



Stop, & pause & breathe.

I forget to stop. To stop & breathe & just feel, notice, be curious about what is happening inside & outside.

Curiosity out the window

I need to invite curiosity to be my pocket roommate & constant intimate companion.



There is a kind of gentleness which comes automatically when I turn towards the critters & the wild things of this world



Even the weather outside receives the open attention & wonder



This mind sometimes not so different from a box of potatoes gone growing…



Um….

Interesting, lovely, amazing even – the will & intelligence of the potato

(Hello Compost)

This quality of attention rarely gets turned around

But that needs to change.



Meditation practice has helped yes

And I need to continue with sitting practice, & to not only read the Dharma –

(Thank you Pema for your practice & writing. thank you Margie for reminding me to re-read When Things Fall Apart, & thank you Mielle for sending me the book in 2009)

– but I seem to require listening to the Dharma as well.

http://www.dharmaseed.org/talks/audio_player/315/23234.html



It’s like a returning, a remembering, a face-palm “o yes, THIS! I forgot!”



I’ve been avoiding listening to Dharma talks, because for a while the talks just triggered the thinking about someone who (relatively) recently broke up with me & so I just stopped listening to avoid that trigger.

But it’s my medicine.

My medicine.

And since I’m not in a Dharma community, it’s up to me to surround myself with whatever medicine helps tend to this mind.



Seeding helps, working with plants helps 

Listening to the Dharma helps…

Making art…



Taking photos, noticing beauty in & of the world





Today is a new day

To practice, to remind myself, to remember when I forget

& to practice the kinder attention.



Gratuitous photo of Genuine, enjoying her grass

(Thank you, Jean, for the photo!)



May you remember the feeling of kindness as your experience of this day unfolds.


Good morning.

IMG_1172.JPG


Breath & 5 senses anchor.

Someone wise
Many years ago
Once told me
That it’s easier to fall down, than to get up.

IMG_0554.JPG
It’s true, I’ve found it to be true.
Gravity always wins.

IMG_0558.JPG
It takes effort to get up
It takes effort to focus the mind’s eye away from a habitual landing place

IMG_1110.JPG
In the case of grief
In the case of loss
The quickest mind route is not unlike the tongue
Going over and over to the place where there was once a tooth

IMG_1112.JPG
Someone wise
Recently
As an antidote
Told me to focus on what was present in my life

IMG_1115.JPG
For me, this is an uphill practice
An effort full practice
This mind running habit stories
Wild mind
Unruly rabbit.

IMG_0898.JPG
The habit has been to focus on what’s missing, the loss
Like that tongue, feeling feeling feeling into where there is no longer a tooth

But

There is much present
So much
There is a great richness in my life

And even when the grief feelings get overwhelming,
There is the breath
to focus upon, to ride like a wave, bringing me to the next and next and next moment

IMG_0810.JPG
There is always something
Always something present
Always something to focus upon which lives in the realm of presence

IMG_0806.JPG
Staying in the sense realms has been helpful
What is here?
See
Feel
Hear
Taste
Smell

IMG_0533.JPG
Where are my feet?
Where is my bottom?

Very nitty-gritty
Very basic.

There is the breath.

It’s come to this
This is my anchor these days

IMG_0075.JPG
Whatever works.


Garlic planting.

This past weekend, the folks who own the land where I’ve been keeping a garden and me planted our garlic.

It’s a bit earlier then I usually plant, since I had been planning on going away for the 2nd half of October – but that’s not happening now – so we went ahead anyways

The moon was in Taurus, which is good for root crops
And the plan was in place that we could simply relax into

So – garlic planting.

IMG_0902.JPG
It was a beautiful day.

I love walking into the barn when the sun streams in…

IMG_0906-0.JPG

IMG_0904-0.JPG

Gotta turn off the electric fence…

IMG_0903.JPG

And get the sorted garlic

IMG_0907.JPG

Peg insisted on playing fetch throughout the day, which was a pleasure

IMG_0911.JPG

Unfortunately & interestingly, I found that a number of the larger heads of garlic had some kind of sadness going on…

These were NOT used for seed garlic

IMG_0912.JPG

Proof & Reason #634 that “bigger is not always better”

And it’s just one more experiment and something to notice with this land & soil… I made it a point to not space the garlic so far apart this time

Intentionally growing for smaller heads of garlic, and see what that yields next season…

Smaller heads keep better, anyhow

It’s exciting already…
Something to look forward to in July…

IMG_0917.JPG

So instead of two rows per bed, I put in three.

Cracked the garlic

And dusted in some Fertrell

IMG_0918-0.JPG

Which both feeds the garlic & amends the soil with some slow releasing rock dusts

IMG_0922.JPG

In goes the garlic cloves

IMG_0923.JPG

Four varieties of Rocambole, which came out to about 150 cloves

IMG_0931.JPG

All in bed

Ready to zip up the rows

IMG_0934.JPG

And add a thick blanket of mulch

IMG_0937.JPG

Slow going, it was loose spoiled hay which was in the barn
So back and forth

IMG_0909.JPG

The pile of hay in the barn

IMG_0953.JPG

With the elegant and formidable spider web near by

IMG_0938.JPG

A friend came by
Helping with the rest of the mulching

Back & forth…

Each time the sheep would come over
I would tell them that they didn’t want this hay, as it had spoiled

Or maybe they wanted carrot tops…?

IMG_0913.JPG

“Petit a petit, l’oiseau fait son nid”

IMG_0958.JPG

(Little by little the bird builds its nest)

IMG_0951.JPG

It was sunny & cool, but all the back and forth warmed the body, allowing for peeling to happen

IMG_0954.JPG

The bumblebees were out on the marigold
I harvested some of the seed heads for next year

IMG_0961.JPG

And one of the Batchelor’s Button flowers came out pink!

Not sure if it will make it too seed stage before a hard frost comes, but I’ll keep a watch on it

IMG_0941.JPG

I have no idea why, but often when I go to pee, the sheep will follow me & watch

IMG_0943.JPG

So curious.

IMG_0949.JPG

And so the continuation, unbroken line of seed saving & planting through time

And thus begins the next growing season

Blessings on all things


Good morning.

IMG_0118.JPG


Good morning.

Image


more than a Ding-dong

F*ckwad is the usual word of choice when communicating with tailgaters while i’m at work.
(no they can’t hear me)
but today, a new word was born for such annoying people
and that would be Douchebomb
because even though bombs are really horrible
(and probably i’m going to hell for making fun of such things, especially now given the global goings-on)
just the thought of a massive amount of saline dumping on some ding-dong-in-a-hurry and smelling like fake flowers puts a smile on my face.

as does going for a walk after work and seeing this and remembering how fortunate i am in my life.

Image