Waking each day in one mood or another
I try to begin each day with a thanks-for-this-day feeling in my heart
Then step into the day.
Today began uneventfully.
Upon putting away a photo of my elder…
(which I had set out for her yortzeit last week, but yesterday & today kept getting the strong push to put it back where it usually sits)
…i found a letter from the person I was beginning to love this time last year.
There was a photo of the two of us, a note from his last visit, & just seeing the handwriting triggered a squinchy feeling in my chest.
And just like that
The weather changed
Right before my morning sit.
I didn’t know what to do with the letter, so I set it down & covered it with an image of His Holiness the Dalai Lama.
I didn’t want to sit with that weather, with those feelings. I didn’t want to feel what had arisen
Lately, I keep hearing Jack Nicholson’s voice from the movie A Few Good Men barking “you can’t handle the truth”
Which feels like a meanness, but I’m trying to just notice that critical voice (which may well be true)
I was glad to get to work, to focus on other things, like chopping vegetables & listening to podcasts on my headphones.
This is from a walk the other day to the lower end of the lake.
And this is from a walk today after work
On the Western side & towards the upper end of the lake
It’s good for me to remember that weather changes.
Just as the feelings came & went by the end of this morning’s sit
Grief continues to visit & can feel very intense at times, still.
I don’t yet understand why – I’m just trying to make room for its passing through.
I haven’t wanted to write much about it
I think I’ve been ashamed of it, wanting to hide its lingering presence.
Thank goodness for kitties.
(All photos of Sophie & Izzy are from Jenny)
I love to receive these photos
They do brighten my day
As does visiting the babies
They are getting so big
This past Sunday the greens & brassicas went into the hoop houses
(Please note the rolled up balls of remay towards the back of the photo…)
But first they waited in the barn as the hoop house soil was readied further
In order for me to do more seeding, the alliums had to wait outside for a spell until all the many trays of greens had a suitable place to sit in the hoop houses
This photo makes me smile
The dances done, working things out, imperfectly, but workable.
(It’s in the 20’s outside, and warmed to the 30s that day, but relatively warm in the hoop house)
This is the first hoop house in process
And this is what happens when I walk into the greenhouse
(It becomes even warmer when the sun shines…)
Joining me in the greenhouse was a small flock of Barred Rock chicks!
Peeping & chirping & napping
I really enjoyed their company
The usual Sunday spring seeding… Beets, Raab, Spinach, Lettuce, Cabbage, Scallions, Chard, Kale, Broccoli, Mustard, Brussel’s Sprouts.
27 trays in all
Then I went to see the hoop house action
The view from the first hoop house towards the long hoop house
Steam rises from the cold water on the warmed soil inside
Here’s that wall of remay balls…
And the barn-dwelling kitties
Hello, Nook & Cranny Farm.
On my walk today after work, despite not being able to hike the trail due to icy conditions…
There are signs of Spring
Swollen fuzzy buds
I feel a sadness when a great old tree is cut down
Over 140 years old…
There’s snow on the ground, but basically it was one huge ice sheet underneath
Wishing you patience & kindness with all of your weathers
Blessings on the day.